Communication and Beyond

Speaking Skills


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Archana Parmar

6 Steps That Will Make You a Better Communicator

Here are six tips for improving your communication style: 1. Identify your style: Knowing how to improve communication skills will come easier once you become aware of your own communication style. Each person has a unique way of communicating. Listen to your own speech. What sorts of words do you use? Which sort of body language and what tone of voice are you using? Now, think of someone who, in your opinion, is a good communicator. Compare your style to theirs. You’ve just taken an important first step in how to improve communication skills. 2. Observe others around you: Now that you are aware of your own style, study the style of those around you. How do the most important people in your life converse? How do they say things? Look for approaches you can model and make your own. 3. Adjust to the other styles of communication: Don’t think it is too late to change your way of conversing because its been years. You had to learn to communicate in the first place and you can unlearn certain behaviors or change them. Sometimes we get stuck in a communication rut. A father once was having a hard time with his teenaged daughter. She was growing and he thought she didnt tell him what was going on in her life. They were in a heated discussion when he asked, Why didnt you tell me? Her answer was that she had, but he was too busy lecturing her to hear her. He learned that adjusting his style to his daughter would involve listening first before jumping right into solving the problem. 4. Rapport: To build rapport, during a conversation try and match the other persons movements, posture and verbal style. Don’t do everything they do, but mirror one or two things. For example, if the person gives mostly short answers to questions, you follow suit. Or, maybe they talk at a slower pace than you usually do-slow your speaking speed to match theirs. This may sound simplistic but it is a very potent way to make someone feel very relaxed and comfortable in your presence. 5. Be mindful of your surroundings: The way you communicate at home may not be the same as in a different environment. Make sure you change your style to suit the different setting. Some comments you might want to tell your best friend, in private. Other things can be shared in a group setting. Learn how to improve communication skills by altering your style for the appropriate setting. Many of us know someone who offers far too much information in a group setting. 6. Avoid imitation: Don’t criticize others for communicating differently. If we all communicated in the same way, we’d soon be bored with each other. Getting a good grasp of your communication style and finding ways to accommodate other peoples styles, is a good way to improve your communication skills. All of these are steps to be taken every single day. The more you implement, the more you master.

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Archana Parmar

3 reasons you cannot speak fluent english

Speaking skills cover a wide range, from engaging in simple conversation to formal public speaking. It certainly plays a vital role in communication process. It is the most important type from the types of linguistic activities. Developing speaking skills help in creating an effective connection among the individuals’ network. Yeah! I am getting overtly expressive with the importance of speaking skills. Now some technical part, speaking is a complicated mental process and a productive skill. Producing speech is not a single skill, rather speaking is an interactive process of constructing meaning that involves producing, receiving and processing information. Effective Speaking includes two categories; accuracy and fluency. This means that developing speaking skill involves the correct use of vocabulary, grammar, pronunciation and having the ability to speak spontaneously. Doing all of this at the same time brings in the ‘unwanted guest’ here: ANXIETY. Speaking is affected by these variables; therefore, foreign language speaking anxiety is one of the most prominent factors that has a negative influence on the oral performance of speakers of other language learning English whether as a second language or a foreign Language. Anxiety is a negative way to present human feelings. When we are anxious we feel nervous, worried and fearful. It is usually associated with unpleasant feeling and is similar to fear. Anxiety in communicating in a second language, especially when that language is English can have an adverse effect and can influence the speakers’ targeted goals. There can be different reasons behind these anxiety attacks: Lack of preparation Feeling of covering too many points in a short period of time Fear of being judged by the audience Now that we know the problem, let’s have a look at the solutions to cure these problems. Identify your fears: you can’t work on improving yourself until you identify the problems. Introspection is the key here. Accept the problems  and share your feelings with others or write them down- read aloud for as long as you are unaffected by how it sounds. Mistakes are the best way to learn so that we are less likely to keep making them. The most important step is to keep practicing. Always remember you are learning to master a second or may be a third language while many native speakers do not even speak a second language. Schedule a free 30 minutes session with me to understand how you can overcome this anxiety. Or write to me at archana@archanaparmar.com

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Archana Parmar

Are you sabotaging your professional communication with these mistakes?

Most of us are English-medium pass-outs, yet we mumble-fumble when it comes to express ourselves in English language. Ever thought of it? Most of the non-native speakers have learnt or studied the English language as a subject and not as a life skill, this contributes to the incompetency or the lack of confidence while communicating in English language and this very lack of confidence affects not just our job performance but also our capabilities as a professional (we all are afraid of being wrong/being judged/made fun of). To a great extent it hampers our growth as an individual. Different people have different problems, to some it is just about not getting the appropriate vocabulary, some find the words stuck in their throat, others doubt their usage of the correct tense, and then there are some who unconsciously use fillers. Fillers, most commonly seen, add to the break in your speech. They serve no purpose, fillers are better labeled as empty pauses. If you use- ‘ummmm, uhhhh, well, you know, ahaa,’ frequently… you know what I mean. Most of the times, the speaker doesn’t even realize that he/she is using these fillers. These empty pauses become a habit. This habit broadcasts insecurity and stifle effective communication. Fortunately, language problems are easy to identify and fix. All you need to do is start talking consciously. Talk slow- consciously- notice in what situations you take these fillers. Whenever you are on the verge of using any filler- You take a pause. Confident speakers pause, pausing as the punctuation of speech, a period is a pause when you’re reading, so are the colons, and the commas. PS: an easy method to get rid of these empty fillers is to record yourself and listen to it. Most commonly used fillers are: ah, um, actually, literally, I mean, like, you know, only, etc. Drop me line here or shoot an email at archana@archanaparmar.com if you want to know more about the tips and tools to become a confident speaker.

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Archana Parmar-Presentation Skills

Presentation Skills

Myth- Great speakers are born; well some of them are certainly gifted, they are born with the ability to stand in front of people and deliver a dynamic speech. While others, the not so gifted great speakers, they usually have invested years of their life in developing and practising their oratorical skills. These are the people who have been through the continuous process of learning, unlearning, and re-learning the basics of Public- Speaking. Just like your favourite sports-star or your favourite film-star, your favourite speaker also puts in great deal of time and efforts. Yes, presentations are a part of Public Speaking with a specialized audience; here the audience is well aware of the topics, intricacies, terminology, outcome, methodology of the topic. The whole concept of these presentations is as old as the Aristotle and Socrates’ times, it is just that the advent of technology has glorified it to its ‘modern work skill’ form. I have put the essentials of Presentation Skills in three pillars- Assess your speaking skills Plan and Prepare your presentation Deliver you presentation effectively Assess your speaking skills: With response to an individual’s behaviour towards Public Speaking, the speakers can be categorized in four groups: Avoider- This group avoids every single opportunity to be on stage        to interact with audience.        to network or talk to strangers        to be in lime-light. Resister- Speakers who belong to this group may resist to be called upon to address an audience, they may unwillingly accept to interact with an audience if it gets an unavoidable situation altogether. Acceptor- This is the group for people who take up the role of the speaker as a part of their job. They occasionally offer to deliver presentations. Seeker- as the name itself suggests, they always seek the opportunities to speak. The difference between all of these categories is the way they manage their stress and anxiety. For avoiders, the anxiety creates roadblocks, whereas, for the seekers, it fuels their passion. Plan and prepare your presentation: Well planned is half done, it applies in the case of presentations as well. Plan everything about the event, right from your personal appearance to your outline and the details of your presentation. Personal appearance- plan everything- keep your attire according to the occasion, colour coordination, hairdo, footwear, accessories. I would like to add a note for the people who wear glasses- wear them if them you really need them during the event or you may invest in a pair of rim-less glasses for such occasions. Prepare your presentation- start with your ‘Why’- why do you need to create this presentation     Who is your audience     Where would you be delivering this     When- time     What- all would it be covering     How- methodology. Working on these ‘WH’ questions will help you in creating a solid structure of your presentation. Body of presentation- Brainstorm all the possible ideas you can think of, related to the topic of the presentation. Prioritize these ideas and shortlist 3-5 topics (depending on the time allotted to you). Write these ideas and 3+1 bullet points hinting what would you be talking about for explaining these ideas. Rehearse- a full dress rehearsal will help you prepare for the actual event. Practice using a conversational tone, humour (in context), avoid chasing perfection- rather develop your own style of presentation. Delivery of the presentation: There is only one way of delivering any presentation effectively, i.e, engage with your audience. The way you connect and engage with your audience plays a key role in delivering a successful presentation. You should be able to communicate not just your word but you enthusiasm as well if you as a speaker want them to be enthusiastic about your ideas. Here, your non-verbal communication and your body language come to play. “It is not just what you say, but the way you say”, makes all the difference. Pay attention to your: Style- choose conversational style of speaking. Movement- move around to connect with them effectively and it will also let your energy flowing. Hand-gestures Facial expressions Voice-tone, pitch, fillers Posture Pace Pauses Learn to listen to your own self- it will tell you how you say what you say. Concluding a presentation: Be open to take up questions at the end of the presentation                                                       Be attentive to your audience’s questions and concerns                                                       Be honest with them is you don’t know any answer, tell them that you will get back to them and do get back to them. Feel free to Like, comment, share. Drop me a line @ archana@archanaparmar.com if you want to learn more about delivering effective presentations or to improve presentation skills.

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Archana Parmar-impromptu speaking

Impromptu Speaking- a skill to learn

What is impromptu speaking? Impromptu speaking is giving an unprepared talk. The typical characteristic of this form of speech is the unprepared delivery and the suddenness with which a person is confronted with a speech situation.  Impromptu speaking is often conducted at those times when a person is called upon without warning ―to say a few words mostly at social/professional gatherings.  Many people assume that impromptu speaking is easy. In reality impromptu speaking is extremely difficult. There are methods, however, if used properly, will enable a person to perform acceptably on the spur of the moment. The thought of public speaking intimidates many people.  This fear can be reduced to a good extent when there is time to prepare and practice before getting up in front of an audience.  What happens, though, when there is not time to prepare?  When you are asked to speak without notice?  This can make the most confident presenters nervous. The key to success in these situations is to have strategies you can use to compose your thoughts quickly and communicate the message clearly.  Becoming skilled at impromptu speaking can give you the self-confidence you need to give a last-minute presentation, sail through a challenging meeting, or convince others of your ideas.  You can build your personal brand when you learn to speak effectively under pressure.  It can also equip you with the techniques to conduct a successful question and answer session or make important connections at a networking event.    By developing this skill, you can learn to speak with eloquence, humor and confidence, and you’ll ensure that you can communicate your messages clearly.  This can be very advantageous as you pursue future leadership roles in near future. The easiest way to prepare for impromptu situations is to anticipate. Anticipating situations where you may be asked to speak unexpectedly.  However, it certainly is not practically possible to anticipate every possible situation in your personal as well as professional life, so having a couple strategies to deal with those unexpected situations or to be able to handle those situations effectively, it is better to anticipate, prepare and practice for an unforeseen opportunity to speak. While preparing for these impromptu conversations, consider the two most common scenarios that people face: Being asked to share your thoughts, answer some questions  Give an update, on a project/filling in for someone, without being told ahead of time. How would you feel if you face either of these situations?  How do you deal these? What do you do?  What do you say?  How do you say it?  What if you can’t think of anything worthwhile to say?                                                                                                   ***** Let’s take you through this, for that, start with brainstorming… You may have many ideas, thoughts, expressions, fears, anxiety and opinions running through your mind when you are chosen to speak in front of a group.  The first thing you must must and must do is to calm yourself down in order to convey your thoughts in a coherence and cohesion.  Take a deep breath or two. That should always be the first thing to do.  A common mistake most people make is that they start speaking before they have gathered their thoughts. Give yourself enough time absorb and observe the question or topic you are supposed to talk about.  These deep breaths are strategically put to help you collect yourself and your ideas. It slows you down, relaxes you, and makes you appear more in control of the situation. As a personal brand you don’t want to project yourself as overtly anxious/nervous/perplexed. In this short time span, or this window of opportunity, try to interpret what is being asked in the question or request and why you?  Repeat the question yourself before answering or better if you can rephrase the question or changing it slightly into what you want to answer. Ask for clarification if you have not understood the question, it will help you be more specific about the answer. At this point you may even ask the speaker to explain it in simpler words. Deal with one aspect/one point of view/ one topic and one supporting piece of information at a time. Remember:  This technique gives you focus and allows you to answer accurately and with conviction. Say it clearly. Do remember: the way you say something is almost as important as what you say. Speak in a confident voice (not just a loud voice!) Use pauses strategically to emphasize a point Avoid sounding monotonous Maintain the eye contact with your audience When you convert your thoughts into coherent speech you are making a conscious effort of making yourself heard. You come across as being confident, persuasive and trustworthy.  So by now, you might have had a fairly good idea how to handle situations where you are asked to respond to a question/situation extempore. Moving on to the situation where you are being asked to deliver an extempore speech.  It is indeed difficult to prepare for an unknown topic, but you can prepare a method to deal with such encounters. One system of doing this is to have in mind various orders by which to develop your ideas. For example, you are asked to talk about ‘Family’. Here, you can talk about the this term indifferent contexts- family as social unit, your family members, values, importance of having a family, structure of family (joint/nuclear), extended family, professional family- your organization/department/unit. In addition to all these, you may also talk about things like: Why is this topic important to your audience? Give a back-story of the importance and relevance of having a family. What are the overall effects of your topic (such as,________) on your audience, the state, the nation, the world?  What are the effects geographically? What are the effects politically? What are the effects economically? What are the effects socially? What are the effects religiously?  What are the effects educationally? What are the effects morally? What are the effects agriculturally? What are the effects emotionally and

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Mute English Archana Parmar

Are you Suffering from Mute English?

Mute English Let’s talk about some moments that can make or break your impression especially the first one. You have been waiting for this moment! You are supposed to introduce a new idea/product to your audience. Excitement!!! You are called by your manager to discuss the appraisals forms. This is the interview, you’ve been preparing for! You finally managed to schedule a meeting with that special someone! You are with a premium potential client you’ve been eyeing on. It is time to talk about what you have been planning for a long time. You know what you are going to say, you are confident of the facts and figures that you are going to talk about. BUT… your brain freeze of words. The words simply refused to come out of your throat!!! You feel like words are choking inside!!! Have YOU EXPERIENCED this? It feels nerve wrenching! Yes, you have. Don’t worry… I know how it feels as I have experienced this couple of times. I am writing this for you to help you overcome the ‘MUTE ENGLISH’ also known as ‘DUMB ENGLISH’. It hasn’t helped you so far, trust me it isn’t going to help in future as well, at all. Mute English is a term coined to describe a phenomenon where a person can read and understand the English language as a second, third or foreign language but cannot speak it well. Now you understand what I am talking about. Don’t you? Next I want to bring your attention to the reason behind this. Why do we get stuck for words or why do we go mute while speaking? It happens for reasons such as : • You can’t think of an appropriate word for what you want to say next. • You experience momentary brain freeze of words and phrases. • You haven’t been working on your active vocabulary. • You experience nervousness or anxiety. • You have a fear of being wrong/fear of being judged/fear of saying something right in a wrong way. None of these deserve to become a hurdle in your way to success. Mute English occurs because you have been told to put an emphasis on literacy, grammar, and correctness in language education. What you need to remember is that you are using a language which is not your first language. So the easiest approach to break the pattern of mute English is to build and practice your active vocabulary. All of us have two types of vocabulary: passive as well as active. Active vocabulary: words from the target language that we use actively in the speech producing skills i.e., speaking and writing. Passive vocabulary: we understand many words as and when we come across them while reading, listening, but we don’t use them while speaking or writing. This results in the loss of retaining that word in our active vocabulary. You need to bring more and more words in your active vocabulary; frequent use of these words will make you comfortable with the usage and retention of the same in your active list. Remember: Rome was not built in a day. Developing active vocabulary will require time and dedication. * Start adding 6 new words a week (trust me it is practical and possible). * Learn the words in association (do not just learn the meaning but also the usage) * Learn new words in relation to the context. * Start with learning synonyms of most commonly used words. For example: the word ‘important’ is the one that I use frequently, so I started developing my active vocabulary by learning 6 synonyms of the word “important”. Important * essential *vital *significant *crucial *influential *necessary Next, I looked at the usage and purpose of all these words. • Building the list of active words and practising the same is important to build vocabulary. • Building the list of active words and practising the same is essential to build vocabulary. • Building the list of active words and practising the same is influential to build vocabulary. • Building the list of active words and practising the same is necessary to build vocabulary. • Building the list of active words and practising the same is crucial to build vocabulary. • Building the list of active words and practising the same is vital to build vocabulary. * Building the list of active words and practising the same is significant to build vocabulary. (www.thesaurus.com has played an important role in helping me overcome the phenomenon of mute English). Stages of learning a second, third or foreign language Stephen Krashen divides the process of second-language acquisition into five stages: 1. Pre-production 2. Early production 3. Speech emergence 4. Intermediate fluency 5. Advanced fluency The first stage, pre-production, is also known as the silent period. Here, the learners start with a receptive vocabulary of up to 500 words all basic ones, but they do not yet speak their second language. Surprisingly, not all learners go through a silent period. Some learners start speaking straight away, with the distorted meanings most of the time, but they are able to recall those few words. In the second stage, the learners are able to speak in short phrases of one or two words. They can also remember chunks of language, although they may make mistakes when using them. Vocabulary is around 1000 words. The third stage learners have their vocabulary increased to around 3000 words, and they can communicate using simple questions and phrases with grammatical errors. Stage four learners have a vocabulary of approximately 6000 words, and can use complicated sentence structures. They are also able to share their thoughts and opinions in the second language, English here. At the fifth or the final stage, the learners can function at a level close to native speakers. The overall process of learning and mastering a second or a foreign language is more of a thought process and the development of self-awareness, rather than academic qualifications or certifications. Be observant of your

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